Today I found out a friend was really upset with me and I felt totally blindsided by it. My first reaction was to be really offended and try to figure out what the heck I could have done wrong. My second reaction was way too close to the first one…so I let it simmer for a bit and remembered some advice from Jen Sincero. When something tough happens - instead of going into a negative spiral, stop and say, "This is good because….." and try to fill in the blank with some great lessons or outcomes from the tough thing.
So.…This is good because I tend to have fuzzy boundaries, and my friend is helping me learn to be more clear. This is good because the situation is uncomfortable, but not as uncomfortable as having a friend hurting. This is good because it feels healthy to get things out and release them.
It's hard to take a step back and get over myself, but I usually feel better when I do.